Photo by Joi Andreoli

Yep. That’s me in the photo. Sitting here a week before my 40th sober anniversary from quitting alcohol and all mind altering substances.

And I mean all. Nothing. Nada. Zilch. …


Photo by Vitolda Klein on Unsplash

If you want to hit the bullseye, you first need to find the target. Then you can aim and fire that arrow. In recovery from alcoholism or any addiction, we do the same thing. …

Photo by Chermiti Mohamed on Unsplash

As you fantasize about a post-pandemic world, have your thoughts and feelings about sex and relationships shifted? In the middle of getting new sweatpants or retiring your old ones, do you find yourself wondering how you can make your sex life different in some way? Or, just a little better?


Photo by Jakob Owens on Unsplash

If you have a serious problem with alcohol, you know the drill.

First, you think, or rather, fantasize, about the drink — a little too much.

Then, you do that ritual thing you do that leads up to getting that drink, like planning your trip to the liquor store or…

Photo by Joshua Sortino on Unsplash

In-person sober meetings are cropping up as we ease into a post-pandemic climate, offering opportunities for direct 3-D contact, yet…

Sober rooms on Clubhouse and Zoom remain a large part of the sobriety cocktail mix, having many sober people transfixed.

The allure of online relating makes sense:

Many alcoholics I…


Photo by Noah Silliman on Unsplash

Average is okay. I mean this. It really is…if you are okay with the ordinary or so-so.

When I use the word mediocre here, though, I’m talking about “of low quality” (which is part of Merriam-Webster’s definition).

I don’t know anyone in recovery from alcoholism, or anyone, really, who wants…


Photo by Finan Akbar on Unsplash

The Liquor Lurker never appears as some vague figure in silhouette, skulking around in a dark alley smelling of stale gin, stalking you. No. No.

The thing that wants you drunk comes in the form of a sophisticated mechanism in your psyche — a cunning creature whose sole purpose is…


Photo by Jakob Owens on Unsplash

Runners, Sneakers, Loafers, Heels and Slippers.

I’m tired of the whiff of stinky alcoholic shoe types in my closet. How about you?

Some smell worse than others, but I want to get rid of them all. I’m about to go through my closet, which, by the way, I just had…

Casual sex is fine — if you can afford it.

Unconscious hookups may have worked for you in pre-pandemic times. Now, as we flirt with the world opening up, perhaps you still want casual encounters where no one discusses what’s happening in the relationship. …

Photo by Taylor Deas-Melesh on Unsplash

Like your grandmother might have said, “Why would he buy the cow when he can get the milk for free?” Don’t roll your eyes just yet.

Some of you may judge this saying as old-fashioned, but sorry, it’s true. If you want an exclusive relationship that has continuity and the…

Joi Andreoli, LMFT

My mission? To share how a positive experience of love and connection in healthy relationships is doable for anyone in recovery (and everyone else, too).

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